I wrote a new song. im sorry steph
www.myspace.com/wellintonalso

so a certain bballa by the name of mike might be going away soon(by no choice of his own) in order to deal with certain issues. scared shitless is how id describe me now. but its cool, they say i need it, but im not so sure. maybe im just an asshole who wont change. did anyone ever consider that. that maybe i just really suck as a person. and that its not my fault people love the bad boy but want to fix him. i operated for twenty three fucking years before this just fine. did anyone think about that. no... fuck im angry. im angry because you may be right, im angry i might be right, im angry because that car didnt kill me. im angry because you didnt leave me. im angry that you love me.

bballa mike is not feeling so bballa today. no sir roonie. lots of pain and im sleepy cause i worked to much. ahh well that the nature of the beast. but it hurts to laugh and well that is no way to live. stupid lady running me over and not stopping. no quote today just sad faces :(

so i was hit by CAR TODAY. it hurt and she kept driving and out of the like 20 cars around no one got out to see if i was ok . it knocked me out of my shoes

"people suck"
bballa mike

so to day is the day that the world finally drops, thats right brad three blogs what now Russia has fired the nukes "but im le tired" andin the words of mengtar "you heard it here first. now for a night of drunken debauchery

"Man, being reasonable, must get drunk; The best of life is but intoxication: . . . " — Lord Byron

so by all accounts i should be pissed and angry to day and yet im only slightly upset. i know you must ask yourself why should the day piss you off and why arnt you. i shall divulge. im the lowest paid manager in the hotel and have been asked.....rather told..... that i am now to handle two managerial positions at the current rate of pay for an undetermined amount of time. fkn hotel gm.
and honestly im not so sure why im in an ok mood but i just am. done and done.

"I have no regrets because I know I did my best"
Midori Ito

so for the most part lately i feel lost, not sure of what is what was or what will be, im sorry ill try to cheer up later and maybe write cool blogs like mengtar and ipwnalone but for now i continue depressed hurt and scared of things that might come.


"The last refuge of the insomniac is a sense of superiority to the sleeping world.
leonard cohen"


Yes, I now feel that it was then on that evening of sweet dreams- that the very first dawn of human love burst upon the icy night of my spirit. Since that period I have never seen nor heard your name without a shiver half of delight, half of anxiety. For years your name never passed my lips, while my soul drank in, with a delirious thirst, all that was uttered in my presence respecting you. - Edgar Allan Poe